When we brought our children into this world, we put them to the top of our priority. We want to give them the best, nurture them to the fullest, care for them tenderly, love them unconditionally, and support them in whatever way we can. Our guidance is incomparable. We want to be the first persons they can count on to whenever they’re in trouble, feel sad, or anxious. In victories, successes, and achievements, we could never be the last one too. That’s how our parenting radar works when it comes to our children. As they say, you never stop being a parent and your role never ends, even after your children become adults — already. Because we only want what’s best for them, we sometimes forget that our children have lives of their own. Of course, they are and always will be our “babies” no matter what, but whether we like it or not, in the real world, they should know when to stand up for themselves, in their own feet, with their head up high. How do they do this? — And we know they can’t do that if we keep treating them like babies. Haha! Admit it.

Growth — they need it, and we need to give it to them too. As parents, we are also responsible to prepare them for the real battle. Part of this growth is to let them spread their own wings and soar high, even if that means us being away from them, letting them go, and them facing life on their own. This is where independence comes in. As children become more independent, our guidance should always be carried out, and our presence must strongly be felt without them losing their own will of judgement and freedom. Starting young among our kids in incorporating independence to their daily activities, decision-making, and tasks make it easy for them to grasp this value early on. If they are equipped with such, there’s nothing to worry about. We have listed these 3 things kids learn when we instill Independence to them, read on.

1)      They feel trusted and respected

Simple things like allowing them to choose what they’d like to wear for today, taking their suggestions on what food to eat for dinner, choosing their own nap times, and trusting them that they do their homework on their own will mean a lot to them. Not only do they practice independence, but they will more likely be responsible and careful of the trust that you have given to them. 

2)      They’ll be able to stand firm in Peer-pressure and Bullying

Independent kids know their limits and boundaries. You value their freedom, they value YOU. The freedom you have allowed them will make them strong to push away pressures with friends, schoolmates, playmates, and other kids telling them to do things you know you wouldn’t want them to do. When bullies get in the way, they are sure as to how to defend themselves in a way that’s not inflicting violence or harm, because you have given them the chance to free themselves from anything that the bullies are deprived of. And that’s freedom. Sometimes, bullies exist so as they could exercise this freedom in a superior way, because they have treated inferiorly at home or where else. ☹

3)      Good values and beliefs are passed on to them

Believe it or not but independence teaches young kids to instill morals and principles that they will greatly use in the actual world. Because you have instill to them independence at an early age, they will carry out your guiding influence as they grow and their inner voice will speak to them as if you were the one talking to them too. You did a great job when this happens! It just means that your child has given a great value on the things that you have taught him/her.

These are only some of the best teachings we can cultivate among children when independence is given importance. The most basic part of maturity and growth is when they can be able to take care of themselves and exercise autonomy on decisions, opinions, and life choices when they finally have to leave us to make a life of their own. By allowing independence you are allowing them time to have their own experiences too to add to their authentic self!