They say that your friends are the family you choose for yourself. True, isn’t it? We may not be given the chance to choose the family we belong to as we need them from the moment we set foot on this earth. But having friends is a different kind of story. We meet people in the course of life and who we get to keep as we journey are the people we get to call “friends”. If treasured and well taken care of, they could be the second-best people we will value in this lifetime next to our family. Because truth be told, friends can turn into family too. This is the reason why we have chosen them, therefore, we strive in picking the right ones, valuing and nurturing those that bring out the best in us, and letting go of those that do not contribute to our growth and whole being. When you are invested in that kind of friendship, you devote your time with them, care for them, love them, and you share your life with them too. Human as we are need these kinds of relationships, because we can’t survive in this world alone. “No man is an island”, as they say.
A famous saying also says: “Tell me who your friends are, and I’ll tell you who you are.” People define who we are, based on the people we choose to surround ourselves with. If we belong to a clique that’s known to be well-mannered, values the relationships they are in, and gets along well with others, they can tell that basically, you are that kind of person too. On the other hand, your identity as an individual is sometimes stained when you surround yourself with peers that are constantly involved with arguments, brawls, disrespect, are bullies, break the law or usually exhibit negative behaviour that others can see. Even if you choose not to let yourself be involved in that situation, the fact that you are friends with these kinds of people, you are unfortunately stereotyped as to be like them. And that’s sad. That’s reality, though and that is what is happening these days. For some, even if they have the capacity to tell that this friendship is not good for them, they stay. Because it’s hard for them to say “NO.” Because they struggle fitting in. Because they are pressured by their peers. Because they think this is easier for them.
This is the reason why choosing our friends and the friendships that we keep is an important part of life and living. We should invest in friendships that value loyalty. One you can trust with the most delicate information of your life, your problems, your secrets, and your sorrows. Those that will give time for you, and be happy for you in your victories, successes, achievements, and life events. Near or far, wherever they are. Some friends come and go, but when the bond is so strong, nothing will change your friendship no matter the distance. Even if you will not see each other for a long time, you know that you will always have a friend in them the moment you see each other again. These are the people who will be celebrating you and your life, and the connection you feel for them is mutual and the same, the kind where you know they will go the extra mile for you even if you don’t expect something in return from them. That is true and faithful friendship.
Admittedly, these kinds of friendships are really hard to find these days. It’s in a way kind of trial and error situation, because you have to really get to know a person before calling them a “friend”. We must be careful in choosing them. And only give them our trust when we have the utmost faith in them. Following our own intuition. But, when life offers you genuine friendships, grab it. Take care of it. And let it bloom and grow until the end of time.
