In the last article we asked the question, does your child have yo-yo self-esteem? Recall that Yo-yo self-esteem occurs when children’s self esteem rises and falls with the ups and downs of their lives (i.e. how they did in school, played in their soccer game, etc.).
We talked about how important it is for children to base their self-esteem on who they are and not on what is happening outside of them so that their self-esteem remains intact no matter what is going on in their lives.
Today we’ll learn three additional tips for supporting your kids in developing solid self-esteem that doesn’t rise and fall with the ups and downs of life:
· The fourth tip is to encourage your kids to identify and honor their own uniqueness. We are all unique in our own special way. Have your kids brainstorm what they love about themselves – from their values, to their character, to their gifts and talents. Have them make an “I love me!” poster which illustrates what they love about themselves. When kids focus on what they love about themselves, their self-esteem will soar.
· Fifth, talk with them about the power of positive self-talk. What they say to themselves is more important than what anyone else says to them. When kids learn to talk to themselves with love, compassion, and support, their self-esteem will soar.
· Finally, teach your children how to handle the “downs” in life. Teach them how to manage mistakes and failure so that they don’t define themselves by these events. Teach them how to manage fear so that fear doesn’t keep them from their dreams. Teach them how to manage change so they feel powerful in their lives and see themselves as capable and worthy.
Learning to handle the “downs” in life as events, not only enhances self-esteem, but also leads to powerful self-confidence as kids learn that they can handle anything that comes their way.
As we mentioned in the last article no matter how much we love our kids or how much time we spend with them, we can’t give them self-esteem, but what we can do is help them develop it in themselves. Start this week by sharing the six tips from these two articles.