We were not born into this world having beliefs about what life is all about. We were not created similarly like a gadget that comes with a manual of belief systems we could turn to when faced with difficulties that involves big decision making and critical thinking. From the time we were born, we are more likely of a blank sheet of paper. Ready to be written upon as we go through life. This means that as humans, we are shaped through our experiences and daily life encounters, as well as the way we see things and our views about the world we live in that also shapes the way we mould our convictions and the principles we hold true about life.
As parents, we should be clear about our own beliefs to begin with. It is important that we acknowledge the beliefs we value when parenting because it is the motivational driving force that we go back to when making decisions, building up the right attitude, and influence our overall totality as humans. These beliefs should be acted upon and should manifest in our lives in order for us to say that these are what really matters to us. It should be shown in our actions, and not just talk about it all the time without actually doing it.
Leading by example is one of the best way children can learn core values of parents and family members. As parents, we must show our children that we uphold the values we want them to follow and be consistent with our actions. Since children are impressionable and easily swayed, it is important for parents and other family members to provide discipline and good examples for their children. All the more that it is important for parents to “practice what they preach”, so that children will be able to follow.
However, as children grow, and become accountable of their thoughts and actions, they are also entitled to have beliefs of their own. Just like us, the beliefs that we value along the way was introduced to us by others or adopted from other people we look up to. When children can already decide on their own, it is up to them what beliefs they would keep, and others they will throw away. Even if they are our children, we should keep in mind that they are individuals too. And as individuals, we cannot make them hold the beliefs that we want them to hold true, when it contradicts to the unique experiences they have encountered as a person of their own. We cannot force our own beliefs to them, and vice versa as we learn differently in our own walk through life and our experiences may not be the same with the other.
Author Cathy Johnson Campbell named 5 sources that provide the main founding blocks that we use in building our belief systems and these are:
1. Evidence – scientific or personal experience.
2. Tradition – ideas that your family and culture have endorsed for generations.
3. Authority – what your teachers, preachers, politicians, medical consultants tell you is true.
4. Association – beliefs that your friends live by.
5. Revelation – inspirations from personal intuition, dreams and imagination.
As you notice, these sources are driven by the way others — either among us, behind us, or above us introduced life and the world we see in our eyes. Exceptionally, evidence and revelation give the individual the chance to rely on their unique and individual encounters. Therefore, it is up to that individual whether to accept these or not and give relevance to that certain belief in their life or reject it and turn their back on it. However, we should not steer away from our goal to instil empowering core beliefs to our children that they would later on carry with them through life. Replacing limiting beliefs to empowering ones could help our children see the bigger picture of a life of happiness, success, and abundance. What they believe in can greatly impact the lives they want to live and the actions they’ll be deciding whether to take or not. Crucial life decisions may depend on the beliefs they have within themselves that would make or break the life we always dreamt for them. It is for this reason that our role as parents should be taken very seriously as to the teachings we provide them with may determine how our children will approach and live their lives.
Watch this :
